Children’s Issues

1. Maintain the same schedules for your children to the maximum extent possible, both before and after filing of any divorce action. Even older children find reassurance in stability of their routines, environment, schedules, etc.
2. Do not discuss any details of your family law case, even before or after filing, with your children. These are adult issues and your children should not subjected to the divided loyalties which inevitably arise when you share details of your marital problems with them.
3. Similarly, never discuss any matters of child support or how their expenses are being handled or perhaps, in your view, mishandled by the other parent.
4. Be supportive and positive with your children concerning their times of visitation with the other parent but do not use this as an opportunity to interrogate the child about the other parent’s dating habits, evidence of new purchases, lifestyle, etc.
5. Provide information to the other parent about school events, medical decisions, doctor appointments, etc. in a timely manner. You will want the same opportunity if the situation is reversed.
6. Even if there are no restraining orders or injunctions in place, do not introduce anyone with whom you have just begun a dating relationship to your children. It takes time for adults to assess whether a new relationship is serious. Your children have enough readjustments without having to worry about how to relate to a new person who may only be temporarily in your life.
7. Recognize that your spouse will have a different parenting style to you. Unless this parenting style places your child in danger or is likely to cause some type of harm or distress to the child, the Court is not going to want to allow you to micromanage the parenting style of your spouse.

Other Divorce Considerations

1. Ensure that you have at least one credit card in your own name prior to filing for divorce. Correspondence from a new credit card company would raise too many red flags; use the address of a trusted friend or relative where the billings may be sent.
2. Make copies of all financial records, photographs and any other data that can be stored safely at a third party location to which your spouse does not have access.
3. Remember that in Texas it is not illegal to tape a phone conversation to which you are a party. So do not make any statements, verbal threats or use any language that you would not want a Judge to hear.
4. If you have any outstanding furniture, art, antiques or jewelry, it would be advisable to videotape the premises where they are in the event your spouse becomes violent after a divorce is filed and damages or removes them.
5. Maintain a spreadsheet or other log of all your normal monthly household and living expenses to better support claims for spousal and or child support. If typical bills or other evidence of statement in support of these expenses can be attached, so much the better.
6. Make sure you change any password on your email and other financial accounts which belong to you.
7. Advise your attorney if you have any alcohol or drug usage that would create a problem if you are suddenly ordered to take testing for such usage by the Court. If you ask your attorney to have your spouse tested, remember that the Court is likely to order you both tested.
8. Do not discuss divorce strategies or other confidential information with even good friends or family. If they are subpoenaed by the other side at trial, none of these communications are protected as confidential and such communications will have to be disclosed.